Top Roommate Problems of the Week (April 25, 2023)

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    Cabinetry - Top Roommate Problems!
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    #1: This college suite mate needs to learn that she may be part of the problem

    Font - My best friend/roommate is dating my other roommate ROOMMATE Hi. I've never really used Reddit before but I seriously need some advice. My current roommate and I have been friends since we were 5 years old, and have been very close since middle school. Our senior year of high school she decided to apply to my top college, and eventually decided to go there and room together.
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    Font - It started off great. We communicated well, supported each other through the transition, and became super close to our two other suite mates. But, around October/November her and one of my suite mates started to hang out together more. They would make plans without me and my fourth suite mate, only talk to each other during group hangouts, and they gradually became more and more obsessed with each other.
  • 04
    Font - Second semester my suite mate asked out my best friend and they have mutual feelings. My fourth suite mate and I were instantly anxious, and after a week of tension and not talking much over spring break, the four of us all talked. I thought it went well at first, and my fourth suite mate and I expressed that we wanted them to be happy and comfortable but we thought some more boundaries should be set. We had already been hurt by being neglected in our friendship, and we thought them datin
  • 05
    Font - Well, almost a month later and multiple group conversations, break downs, and angry rants between my suite mate and I, things seem to only be worse. We keep telling them that they are still ignoring us, not communicating when they want alone time, putting minimal efforts into our individual friendships, talking to our other friends behind our backs (separate gc, plans where they exclude us, etc.) and it seems that they don't actually care about how we feel,
  • 06
    Font - just that we leave them alone and they don't have to feel guilty about it. My best friend had a one-on-one conversation about a week ago in which she said that she is trying, she just feels like me and my fourth suite mate are still so angry all the time. I told her that even if she is trying, and even if I acknowledge that, her actions seem like they're just to make her feel less guilty (like invite us to hang with them but then only talk to each other or asking how our day is when we co
  • 07
    Font - I just don't know what to do anymore. I understand that my friend wants me to be happy for her, but how can I when she's dating someone who has outwardly said she hates me to others and constantly avoids me. Someone who I used to also be friends with.
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    Font - My fourth roommate and I keep trying to tell them how we're feeling and where they're going wrong, but it just seems like they don't want to put in any effort anymore. Most recently they have turned off their locations and left the dorm room without a word to go do things by themselves hours on end. I get it's a new relationship. I get that they want alone time. I get that priorities are going to change. But I feel like I've done all I can to save my friendship and she just doesn't want t
  • 09

    #2: This dog owner needs to get it together or leave!

    Font - Roommate puppy So I posted about this once before, but long story short, I moved into a random living situation, and for the most part, I've lucked out besides one roommate. They have a puppy, which we discussed from beginning wouldn't be our responsibility. As soon as we moved in, puppy quickly became mine and whoever else was working from home's responsiblity. We tried to bring up in passing, that you can't leave a puppy crated for 8 hours, and that they need a dog walker, and nothing c
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    Font - We set up a house meeting, which they proceeded to get defensive in and somehow it was our fault for not letting them know that this was a problem and that we agreed to this when we agreed to live with a dog. Eventually, they got a dog walker, which we appreciated, but it has seem to only get worse from here. Dog has peed multiple times on our couch, and in my room, and roommate insists she's potty trained and doesn't believe in taking out puppy to pee too much.
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    Font - Because of the frequent accidents, we have told them we don't want the puppy on the couch we all bought together. This rule, and our insisting that they get a dog walker, resulted in the roommate setting up another meeting. This the update from my previous post.
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    Font - The whole meeting, they proceeded to spin the whole story around about how we all agreed to live with a dog, and it doesn't seem we want the dog there at all with "all of our rules". Those rules being get a dog Walker - so we aren't stuck with the dog, and not to allow puppy on couch because she's peed on it multiple times and we even offered to get the dog a bed so she has a place we can train her to go instead. Somehow, us asking for simple things is us being cruel and making their live
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    Font - We were the ones watching their dog when they were gone - for free. Cleaning up their puppy's mess, yet they were stressed. And they continued to insist puppy was potty trained and the accidents we pointed out were not a big deal. I honestly don't even know how to move forward. How can someone claim their dog is potty trained when they have multiple accidents in a day? how can someone think it's okay to push all the responsibilities of their dog on others, and somehow they are the victim?
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    #3: This roommate hogs the kitchen and spies on OP!

    Font - My roommate spends all day in the kitchen and it's infuriating My roommate doesn't get a lot of social interaction and I try to be sympathetic to that but she loiters in the kitchen ALL day. She has the biggest room in the house with an office and has territory over the living room (I haven't been in there once) yet she will work from home at the kitchen table without headphones. It just seems super inconsiderate.
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    Font - The moment any other roommate uses the kitchen, she runs in from the other room if she's not there and talks to us. She'll make excuses to talk, like mentioning house stuff and whatever else. It's just exhausting. I started just hanging out in my room but then she migrates and spends all day in the backyard, which is directly outside my room and has a big window looking into my room. She definitely peeks through the window causally. Like, I literally have to close the curtains to get priv
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    #4: Is this roommate overreacting or could this "laundry trick" actually cause some damage?

    Font - I just found out how one of my roommates is doing her laundry... I (21F) share a small house with two other women (23F "Sarah" and 22F "Jane") and this evening I came into the kitchen to do my dishes from dinner when I saw that the lid of our washing machine (it's in a room just off the kitchen) wasn't closed all the way but the cycle was still going. I got worried and paused the cycle so I could see what was going on but while I was doing that the dryer buzzed and Sarah came out of her r
  • 17
    Font - I said "Hey, it looks like the lock on our washer lid got disconnected..." and she said "Yeah, I did that." when I asked her why she said she likes to "stir in" her laundry detergent while the machine is on the wash cycle (edit: I was doing a load this morning and realized the lid doesn't actually lock until it hits the rinse cycel, so there's nothing stopping her from opening the lid when the wash cycle is going without dismantling the lock) because otherwise she finds streaks of deterge
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    Font - I suggested that she may be using too much detergent and that she can pour in the detergent when the washer is still filling before the lid locks, but she said she doesn't use too much detergent and that nothing bad has ever happened from it. I told her I felt weird about her doing that because water could potentially get out or some other problem could occur but she said "I've been doing my laundry this way for over a year and it's been fine."
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    Font - I'm not sure where to go from here. I've never noticed it before but now that I know she's doing it I really don't feel good about it. Am I overreacting? Is there another way I could talk to her about it? This washing machine is still relatively new and I would hate to have to replace it so soon if something happened. Other than this she's a great roommate and we've become very good friends.
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    #5: Ah, the intentionally annoying slob!

    Font - Roommates leaving dishes and crumps on purpose My roommate and I used to be best friends but everything changed when we moved in. Long story short, she's a slob. Leaves crumbs every time she eats and never puts her dishes in the dishwasher. I have repeatedly asked her to clean up after herself and she always says she's "busy." Now it's to the point where she is leaving crumbs on purpose just because she knows it annoys me. How can I help myself deal with this? Talking to her won't help be
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    #6: When you realize that awful smell is your roommate's feet...

    Font - my roommate smells bad and idk what to do So I just got this new roommate who's staying until July and I've noticed that her feet smell awful. Like...abnormally bad, to the point where i've nearly gagged a few times. I've tried to open my windows (it's cold outside), use a glade plug in, and spraying the entire room with air freshener when she's not around, but the smell seems to always creep back. I try to spend as much time out of the room as possible because of this. I know it's a very
  • 22

    #7: This Redditor is now being forced out by her three roommates

    Font - 3 roommates were leaving, asking me to move out. What do I do? said they now they're 4 months ago, 1 roommate said they were sick of the house members, and wanted to move out. (It was winter, they were stressed). I asked the other two roommates if they wanted to stay and they said no. I have largely kept to myself since then and just received a message saying they are now all friendly with each other and want me to move out.
  • 23
    Font - This really up my plans. I was going to take over the lease and find new roommates, but they are insisting I leave because I'm now the odd one out. There's a 3 person lease and I am on it. The landlord, I'm guessing, would rather have 3 tenants he knows and 1 new one vs the other way around. What should I do?
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    #8: I smell a lawsuit coming...

    Font - Roommate destroyed our apartment I moved in with a "friend" in August of 2021. She and I were both going through breakups and trying to get back on our feet, so we got a place together and everything was fine until she stopped cleaning up after herself. She apologized and said it was her depression, which I understood since I was in a similar boat. Once I started seeing someone, we moved into our own place (March '22) for privacy, and I found a subletter to take over the remaining 6 month
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    Font - When the subletter, L, came to view the place, it was very clean and my roommate, K, insisted that she was going to clean up after herself and stop being messy. A few months into them living together, L texted me saying that K was completely destroying the place and the rental company was doing nothing about it. Her cats were peeing and throwing up everywhere and she had gotten a dog that was also pooping and peeing in the house. I reached out to the rental company and asked if there was
  • 26
    Font - forward to April 2023 and I just received a letter from a collections agency that my roommate and I had a balance of 5k for damages to the apartment. I had never gotten an email, call, or message from the rental company about this, and now I am unsure of what to do with the debt. I find it very unfair that my ex roommates disgusting living habits dragged me into this situation, and she told me she's just going to ignore it. If anyone dealt with a similar problem, please tell me, is there

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